Wednesday, March 3, 2010

The Olympics

Instead of kicking Olympians out for taking steriods
they should
put those Olympians in a league of their own!

Have the average and bland olympics
and then
have the Olympics for super humans
call it the OH-YEAH-lympics!

I dream of this magical event
The womens upper lips would be oh so hairy from excessive testosterone

Males muscles would bulge so much and their necks would be so thick that they would not be able to fit the medal around it

Urine testing would be a thing of the past and athletes would be kicked ou for NOT using performance enhancing drugs

Weight lifters wuld be required to lift large automobiles and small islands and their performance would be measuored by the amount of veins that pop out from their body

Javelin contestants would be required to bend the javelin then throw it like a boomerang

The martial arts section would become straight out street fighting and would be won by the first one to draw blood

The brawls in netball would be scary yet arousing at the same time

Sumo wrestling would be like a Blastoise vs a Snorlax and the earth shattering body slams would be heard from now untill the Olympics in 2012

The rage-a-thons by the lawn bowls contestants would send normal olympic athletes back to the very first Olympiad!

I long for a day when this event will be televised instead of watching these semi-superhumans in the normal olympics do ordinary feats of human strength
i want to see humans stretched to their limits
stretched so far that their skin will tear because it wont be able to hold those mean man machines
I want to see Abnormally-insanely-guiness-book-of-record-material-hella-powerful-cyborgly-muscly-humans partaking in sports that will leave even the most desencitized 18 year old boy so mind blown that it will make 2 girls one cup seem like a speech from the pope!


  1. This comment has been removed by the author.

  2. I only have one thing to say to this: LOL!!!
    (Edited because I am retarded.)